A few years after my divorce, I lost my job. Never had I experienced such difficulty finding another. The unemployment rate was high, jobs were scarce and I was “over-qualified”. Panicked, I took a job I never should have accepted. It was less than half my previous pay in a field I had no experience in, but it beat unemployment – or so I thought.
The job was unsafe. Anxiety-ridden, I lasted three months before begging to return to unemployment. They were backlogged and I had to wait for a fact-finding. I waited, unsure if it would be approved, fearful that it might not.
Shortly thereafter I found myself at an all-time low. Money wasn’t coming in. I had exhausted my savings. Only my father knew my situation. He helped some, but I didn’t want to take advantage of his generosity or burden him so I didn’t let him know how bad it was. Pride kept me from telling others. And few knew where I lived since I’d downsized to a one bedroom apartment.
It was a week before Christmas. Unsure how I would put more food on the table for my daughter - I got on my knees and begged God for help. I was desperate.
That day, when I went to the mailbox, I found an envelope addressed to me with no return address. It was a Christmas card, unsigned with a hand-written note stating, “This is how God showed his love to us: He sent his one and only son into the world so that we could have life through Him. 1 John 4:9”. Included in the card was a $100 gift certificate to Hannaford.
I have no idea who sent the card. The fact that I didn’t advertise my situation or my whereabouts coupled with the anonymity of it following heartfelt prayer settled the idea in my mind – it was from God. He may have used a servant on earth to complete the task, but that did not negate that God – the creator of the universe – was reaching out to me. Me!
In brokenness, humility and extreme gratitude, I fell to my knees in tears. That was the point of my revival. I resolved to follow where He led rather than fight Him for the steering wheel. That day, I determined to live my life for Him.
After Christmas my unemployment was approved. The backlog of funds followed. My life has steadily improved since and continues to do so.
I have been learning and practicing obedience and faith ever since. Though I’m unworthy of His mercy and grace, He has given it to me. I am eternally grateful. My new heart’s desire is to live a life that reflects how grateful I am. And I know He will give it to me. For one, it aligns with his desires. For another, it is written in Psalm 37:4: “Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.”
You are loved,
J F Rogers